April Fools has come and gone, but there’s one internet joke we actually wish was real.
On Sunday, the website Essence of Hygge popped up claiming to sell pure, ethically-sourced "essence of hygge," which dear god, would sell like hotcakes if it really were possible to bottle a feeling.
For the uninitiated, the word hygge, pronounced HOO-ga, is meant to describe the ultimate comfort and coziness that the Danish live in all year long.
"Hygge is a Danish word that is a feeling or mood that comes [from] taking genuine pleasure in making ordinary, everyday moments more meaningful, beautiful or special,” according to Hygge House. Just imagine being able to spritz that feeling from a bottle any time you’d like.
“Today VisitDenmark is proud to announce the world's first line of luxury hygge products,” the site, set up by the real Visit Denmark, joked. “Now everyone can buy and instantly experience a little bit of hygge for themselves. Welcome to the age of Hygge.”
The site explained that the new essence of hygge was “first discovered in 1918 by Danish horticulturalist Torben Hansen while working with the rare and elusive Middlefart Orchid.” Hansen, the story goes, stumbled upon the flower’s powerful enzyme, phosphohyggenase, by accident while conducting various experiments.
“Unfortunately, he was struck down by a mysterious illness from which he never recovered, preventing him from documenting his groundbreaking discoveries, and his research was thought to be lost in the sands of time,” the site said, “until now.”
So if this mythical essence were real how would they extract it?
“Our hygge harvesters hand-pick the rare but beautiful Middlefart Orchids using sustainable methods,” the site hilariously added. “Once extracted from the plant the Essence is then hand-filtered by our Comf-ologists at our laboratoire in Hørsens through four hand-knit sweaters in strict candle-lit conditions to preserve the photosensitive raw materials.” Finally, the site said, the harvesters distill the Essence with “aggressively-foraged botanicals and organic industrial-purpose alcohol in a complex patent-pending process.”
As for why you should purchase a bottle of Essence Of Hygge? The site said it would give you an improved sense of well-being, heightened focus and energy, and a distinct aversion to overuse of smartphones and social media, which honestly sounds terrific and well-worth your fantasy money.
Sadly, when customers attempted to put products like “Unisex Essence of Hygge Fragrance” and a “Hygge Starter Kit” in their online shopping carts, they were met with an “April Fools” message.
But, instead of feeling too sorry for yourself that you can’t buy bottled comfort, why not do the next best thing and book a trip to Denmark. This way you’ll get to experience hygge yourself in the country that made everyday relaxation famous. Or, at the very least, grab a thick, heavy blanket, put on your slippers, light a candle and sip your favorite tea while reading a good book. You’ll feel extremely comfortable, and that’s no joke. visitdenmark.com
